Governor Murphy touted a major Monday reopening announcement this weekend which, to the surprise of no one, ended up being a bust, Save Jerseyans.
And by Governor Murphy, I mean Rev. Shaw Moore from “Footloose.”
–
Murphy tweaked capacity for certain types of gatherings – nothing that dramatically changes anyone’s life – but it’s his dance floor restrictions that are rightly attracting social media scrutiny. Restaurant capacity is still treading water with tourist season right around the corner.
According to Reverend Phil, dances floors at private catered events (like a wedding) can reopen with social distancing and masks. Bars and night clubs? Sorry, kiddos.
So Governor Murphy is telling you that, in his scientific, data-driven opinion (just don’t ask to see the data), wedding dance floors are safe but bar dance floors are not. He also expects people to dance distantly whatever the hell that means, and prom-goers will need to mask up.
Clearly, no one has ever invited Phil to a decent wedding. Can’t say that I blame them.
There’s also about as much logic and science on his side as there was for John Lithgow’s iconic 1980s movie character. Does COVID-19 know the difference between a high school senior prom and a Jersey Shore bar dance floor? I’d expect you’re just as if not MORE likely to kill grandma dancing with her to Sinatra at your cousin’s wedding than bumping-and-grinding with a Staten Island Bro at D’jais this summer. That second situation isn’t exactly without risk, of course, but for different reasons than coronavirus.
The common thread between Murphy and Shaw is paternalism. Both men chronically think they know what’s best for everyone else and can’t be swayed by reason. Unfortunately for Murphy? Lithgow is the much better actor of the two. Most of us can see right through this “distinguishing between dance floors” act…
Here’s the relevant presser clip in case you missed it:
–
