By Dan Cirucci
Posted with permission from The Dan Cirucci Blog
Unless you’ve been lying under a rock, you’ve heard about the controversy surrounding the “Christmas” song Baby, It’s Cold Outside. Some radio stations have now actually banned the song on the grounds that it preaches male dominance and sexual coercion, if not rape.
Well, to begin with it’s not even a Christmas song. It’s a song about the cold weather and winter. Anyway, if we’re gonna take offense at the lyrics of this song and charge it with not being politically correct, consider all the other holiday songs that would come in for rebuke:
Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer (photo, above)
Mocking senior citizens and encouraging elder abuse.
Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer
Ridicule and bullying based on personal features without respect for differences.
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
Celebrates mommy who loves role-play with a lecherous “old-man.”
Encourages woman to find sugar daddies who will lavish them with gifts in exchange for . . . what?
O Little Town of Bethlehem
Disrespects small towns just because they may not have modern conveniences or facilities.
All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth
Mocks the natural childhood loss of baby teeth and needlessly scares kids into believing their new teeth may never grow in.
Dominick the [Italian] Christmas Donkey
The entire song is an ethnic slur. Also offensive to donkeys.
I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
Bratty kid doesn’t have enough; needs a wild animal, too. Encourages animal cruelty as animals such as this should not be removed from their natural state.
So, what’s wrong with a red Christmas or green Christmas or yellow Christmas or a purple Christmas? Why does it have to be white?
The Christmas Song
“Folks dressed up like Eskimos” mocks Eskimos. They’re not “dressed up” like that for fun. That’s their natural, practical, necessary attire.
All I Want For Christmas Is You
Equates human beings with material possessions. You have no right to possess anybody, on Christmas or any other day.
Twelve Days of Christmas
An endless celebration of greed and excess.
We Three Kings
Exalts monarchies, autocratic regimes and feudalism.
God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman
Sexist. Totally ignores women.
A Holly Jolly Christmas
Encourages the kissing of total strangers under the mistletoe: “Kiss ‘er once for me.”
Use of precious silver for such frivolous purposes depletes the environment.